Say hello to my little friend

I'll admit it - I haven't really dedicated much time solely to the SEC. So on this holiest of football days - Thanksgiving - I will give the masses what they desire. And by masses, I mean the handful of my friends who bothers to read this.

The SEC has had quite an interesting year. At times, seven teams were ranked in the top 25. Currently, five are ranked, with two more receiving votes. LSU certainly appears to be in the drivers seat with respect to the BCS Championship. Tim Tebow is the leading candidate for the Heisman Trophy. And once again, the SEC will send two teams to the BCS games. This level of dominance is not often seen. In fact, this dominance evokes memories of a once-prominent businessman who reigned over this country - Tony Montana. Yes, the legendary Cuban drug dealer immortalized in the masterful film Scarface.

I believe that the SEC will reign longer than Tony Montana (and hopefully avoid a shotgun blast to the back) but the level of power is eerily similar. In fact, you can take individual members of the SEC and relate them to characters in the film:

Sosa (LSU) - Sosa is the undisputed leader of the drug world. His every command is carried out with swift and ruthless execution. His power is shown when he orders Tony Montana's assassination, which is carried out by an army of at least 50 people. LSU has been equally oppressive, with four top 5 Coaches Poll finishes in the last five years, including the 2003 National Championship and this year's number one ranking. LSU looks to add to its legend with another SEC title and BCS title this year.

Tony Montana (Florida) - Tony is ruthless, ambitious and feared by his rivals. He quickly rises to power and immediately becomes the center of attention in whatever situation he enters. However, he is ultimately undone by his personal flaws, greed and a love of cocaina. Florida shares these traits, especially Tim Tebow. Florida's reliance on Tim Tebow cost them the Georgia game, when Tebow's bruised shoulder prevented him from running the ball and Georgia was able to key in on the rest of the offense. Also, Tim Tebow carries himself on the field with a reckless abandon that Tony Montana would appreciate. Urban Meyer also represents the "ambitious new guy" side of Tony Montana, winning a National Championship in only his second season at Florida.

Manny (Georgia) - Manny is the second fiddle to Tony's lead. Everyone loves Manny, but no one fears him. Manny is not willing to take that last step to becoming the number one guy. Georgia always seems to fall into this role. As a Tennessee fan, I have no hatred for Georgia (like I do for Florida and Alabama) and I don't get the sense that many other fans fear and hate Georgia. The 'Dawgs will probably finish this season with at least 10 wins, but yet will fall just short of being a nationally acclaimed team.

Frank Lopez (Tennessee) - Frank is in charge of the Miami market, at least until the ambitious Tony knocks him off his perch. Frank is used to doing things the old way and doesn't want to ruffle any feathers and take big risks. Tennessee, and especially Phil Fulmer, fits this description. Fulmer has taken some heat over the last couple of years for his traditional offense and seems to be in danger of losing his job to a flashy newcomer. It has become clear that some changes are needed if Tennessee is to make a run for the spot at the top.

Elvira (South Carolina/Kentucky) - Elvira (played by Michelle Phfieffer) is the beautiful girl that Tony must have no matter what. She is classy, desirable, and witty. By the end of the film, however, Elvira is nothing more than a coked-out blonde with no life skills. The parallel is fitting for these two SEC East teams, South Carolina and Kentucky. Both were once ranked in the top ten in the same week, before they both lost in the same weekend (10/20) to begin a sad trend down towards irrelevance. Including those first two losses, these teams have combined for a total of seven losses since reaching their top ten rankings.

Omar Suarez (Alabama) - Frank's second-in-command, Omar Suarez is accompanied by Tony Montana on a business trip to Peru, where Sosa accuses Omar of being a "stoolie" and has him thrown out of an airborne helicopter. Alabama has always been a traditional power, however once the NCAA cracked down on Alabama for various recruiting and booster violations and placed the team on probation (allegedly on a tip from Tennessee and Phil Fulmer), Alabama has not been the same. Losing numerous scholarships and dealing with a postseason ban was devasting for Alabama's recruiting. The Tide has not participated in meaningful bowl game since the 1999 season Orange Bowl, when they won the SEC.

Gina Montana (Arkansas) - Gina is the beautiful sister of whom Tony is so protective. In fact, Tony is so protective that he murders his best friend Manny when he found out that Manny had been sleeping with Gina. Of course, what he didn't know was that the two had just gotten married. Darren McFadden (more than Arkansas) is the Gina of the SEC. McFadden continues to get Heisman support and any SEC fan will howl if his name is not mentioned in the top five. While Gina was riddled with bullets in the film's finale, McFadden's Heisman hopes have already been riddled by his team's multiple losses and some subpar offensive performances.

Rebenga (Vandy) - A minor character, Rebenga is the Communist leader who Tony assassinates for a green card at the beginning of the film. I don't know much else about him, but I can assume if Rebenga was a Communist government leader that he was fairly well-educated. Vanderbilt is likely fielding the most intelligent team in the SEC, but it doesn't prevent them from being eviscerated on a regular basis by their more brutish counterparts.

The Diaz Brothers (Miss St/Ole Miss) - The Diaz brothers are Tony and Frank's rivals in the early goings of the film. They never make an appearance but are spoken about on occasion. Mississippi State has played in only one New Year's Days bowl since 1940 (a 38-11 loss in the 1998 Cotton Bowl), while rival Ole Miss has been only moderately more successful. These two teams rarely factor into any SEC discussion, unless they happen to be playing a team competing for the SEC or National Championship.

Mel Bernstein (Auburn) - Mel is the crooked Narcotics detective who is regularly paid off by Tony and Frank, until Tony decides he has had enough and kills Mel. Mel always has a smug look on his face and a feeling of invulnerabilty, given his badge status. Obviously, it doesn't help him in the end. Auburn is in the same position, as they are not quite as good or powerful as they think they are. Outside of their 2004 13-0 season in which they did not have a chance to compete for the National Championship, Auburn does not have any BCS bowl appearances. You can bet that Auburn fans will be screaming to the grave about the injustice of 2004.